“Oh, look, they have cherry bubble gum,” I said to my husband, as I stared wide-eyed at all of the gum selections. Thought I’m not particularly fond of cherry flavored anything, I was up against a deadline, and I was a bit giddy and overwhelmed. A true kid in a candy shop. The deadline was my husband rushing me out of the gas station, and I was overwhelmed because it was the first time I would get to chew gum since some extensive dental work.
“Ok, well grab it if you want it, but let’s go,” he said. My hand hovered over the “Sweet & Sassy Cherry” (I just liked the word “sassy”) and over the watermelon flavored pack. Cherry, watermelon, cherry, watermelon, cherry, watermelon. I grabbed both, and scurried over to the cash register.
In the car, I stared down at the two packs in my lap, wondering why I had picked the cherry one. My husband has a cherry scented car air freshener, that I think stinks something awful. He’s a fantastic driver, but I would get headaches and dry heaves from the scent alone. We’d be driving along, “jamming out” (as he calls it) to the music, while I wretched and loudly dry heaved in the passenger seat. No thanks. That’s not attractive.
With high hopes, I carefully unwrapped a piece of the bright red cherry gum, making sure no paper wrapping made it into my mouth.
I chewed slowly at first, anticipating the flavor rush into my saliva glands. I could easily taste the “sweet” portion of the “Sweet & Sassy,” but I think the sassiest ingredient they added was cough syrup. It straight up tasted like I drank an entire bottle of the stuff. It was only good because I woke up that morning with a little bit of a sore throat. Problem solved!
I spent the rest of the day looking for someone who I could pawn off the cherry pack to. I really don’t even like bubble gum all that much.