Where two gather, there the church is.

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accountability, bible, Christ, christmas, expectations, failure, friendship, gift, reading, Salvation, scriptures, study, The Church

True Identity Bible for Women

 

“For where two or three gather in my name, there am I with them.”

Matthew 18:20

My church encourages its members to form smaller than small groups. We call them “2’s and 3’s groups”. The idea is for two or three (of the same-sex) people to gather together on a regular basis to be accountability partners, to read and discuss God’s word together, and share in life experiences with one another. It is good for women to meet with other women to discuss womanly things. Likewise, it’s good for men to be manly with other men! (Laughing) It is even better for them to get together to meditate about God.

Tonight my “two” and I (is she the two to my one, or am I the two to her one?) will get together for our first official meeting/gathering/drink coffee and choose a reading plan session. Not sure what to call it.

My two and I are newer friends, only introduced to each other a month or more ago at church. We both got Kindle Fires for Christmas (SCORE!) and both got new study bibles for Christmas. Totally meant to be! She’s also an incredible woman with strong faith, who is NOT afraid to pray. Awesome.

We will only be able to meet every other week for now, but we will pick a reading plan to do together. My theme for 2012 is “Daily” (you can read more here) so I will be dedicating to the Lord the time he has so graciously given to me.

The bible I got for Christmas (technically it was an anniversary gift, which makes it the best ever!) is an NIV version “True Identity” women’s study bible. It has 30 day plans where it walks you through Christ’s life in 30 days worth of scriptures. There’s a reading plan that covers the women of the Bible in-depth, there is a topical guide that is not so average with topics such as, “Parents, Failure, Expectations, Grief, Horoscopes” and more. (You can click here to read why I will never again read my horoscope.)

Below are some pictures of the best bible I’ve ever owned, and one I hold close to my heart: Maybe it will be perfect for you, too.

Myths that women believe, and the scripture to prove them false.

I truly look forward to the year 2012 and know that this is the year I will become closer to God than I thought possible. I’m sure that is welcoming trials, but with God for me, I say, “Bring it on”.

Conversations about topics most women need to hear.

Virtually anywhere blog

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dr, friendship, nashville, road trip, weekend, weigh, weight, worship

Good morning, loyal readers!  Today I blog from the parking lot of my dr’s office. I’m too early to even go inside. Whoops! Traffic wasn’t as bad as I anticipated.

Today I am excited to see the results of my exercise and partial starving myself (partially kidding) by seeing the numbers on the scale. Am I abnormal or what? I actually want to be weighed! It sucks that the only thing I could find to eat on my way out the door were donut holes… And I had like four. But hey, a grumbling stomach isn’t attractive!

I will be in Nashville this weekend, and I CANNOT wait! I am going on a girls only trip with a friend from church, and we will be attending a worship conference there. Heck yeah to getting out of dodge for a bit. Dodge can get boring and stale if it’s not spiced up from time to time.

Hoping to have some fun weekend pics for you all.
Blessings,
C.d

Shout out to my sistah

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acceptance, family, friendship, inspiration, love, Sisters, tolerance

There’s nothing quite like sisterly love.
I have one sister {birthday shoutout} who is a few years older than me, and many years wiser.

I have many fond memories with my sister, such as her younger self stomping off and slamming her bedroom door after Monday night family time; me lending her my brand new (unworn) clothes when I returned home from the store; my mom favoring her by mailing her dessert bars wrapped in tinfoil, and sending me home with lasagna in tinfoil instead (honest mistake); us driving to see each other for the weekend during college years; or flying together most years to spend her summer birthday at the beach.

I love my sister, and could never duplicate the type of relationship we have with anyone else. No one else can call me while she’s sitting on the pot and it be acceptable. No one else can watch me pick my nose and not be thoroughly disgusted. No one else will I let listen to the same Gnarles Barkley song over and over and over again without wringing her neck. (She will deny her infatuation with that song if questioned.)

There’s nothing like a sister’s love, tolerance, and advice. No one else can be so different from me, and love me anyway. No one else has such a similar laugh, such similar mannerisms, or funny nicknames for me.

I know that no matter what, I have a built-in friend, someone whom I can trust and love completely, without worrying about getting hurt or judged. Even if my “short” versions of my stories are still very very long. I can’t help it. I get it from my sister.

You best step off.

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boundaries, friends, friendship, job, marriage, no, parenting, relationships, work, yes

Image via mandoran.wordpress

Last week there was question posed on the Daily Post at WordPress which asked, “What can’t you say no to?”. Typically I love to read the Daily Post ideas, but have found them to be more like questions asked on an awful first date, as opposed to an entire post topic… until I read this one. Here’s my answer: I can’t say no to people.

I used to have a hard shell and a hard heart. I worked in law enforcement. I was tough. After some necessary changes, and a career hop, I started to soften up. Maybe it was due to working with high school students, which I loved, or having something along the lines of my dream job, but my backbone started to melt slowly out of my body. Before I knew it, I was spineless.

Moving to a new location often does something strange to me: it makes me say “yes” to any obligation. It’s as if I had changed my name to Carl, from Jim Carrey’s “Yes Man”. 

Neighbor: “Would you like to slowly wash the outside of my house using only a toothbrush? I’ll pay you $50.”
Me: “Yes!”

Potential friend: “Would you like to attend my Pampered Chef/P31/Scentsy party and pay an arm and a leg for something you don’t need or have the money for, eat fattening food, drink cheap wine, and leave feeling exceptionally low on self-esteem?”
Me: “Yes!”

Stranger: “Would you please help me change my tire even though you’re wearing all white and are headed to a job interview?”
Me: “Yes!”

Truth be told, I don’t want to do half of the things I say yes to, but that is how our society works. It’s how I keep friends, keep a job, stay married, help the needy, and keep a full calendar.

I am coming forward as a new and improved Caitlin. My backbone has regrown. Watch out for (drum roll…) BOUNDARY SETTING.

Image via evilspeculator.com

Why are boundaries so hard to set for some people?
I have found myself involved with person after person who either doesn’t respect my boundaries, or hasn’t created his/her own. I have to take charge; it’s up to me. The best thing I can do is say “no” once in a while, be firm in agreements and conversations, and only agree to activities/events I really enjoy. Otherwise, I’m cheating myself, and lying to the other participants.

Why are boundaries so easy to cross for others?
It’s simple. Someone who doesn’t recognize a boundary from a bouncy ball is unable to set their own boundaries in place, therefore, they are unable to recognize that you’ve set any in place. My personal opinion is that selfishness causes people to not respect others’ boundaries, and not set their own. Those who are stubborn, spoiled, or stuck-up do not care if you have boundaries. The world revolves around them, right? Wrong. It’s time to put them in their place (respectfully).

How to set basic boundaries:
-Boundaries are healthy, but difficult to enforce. They require someone to admit that something is not working, to pause, take a step back, and assess the situation in a mature manner. Sometimes boundaries unintentionally hurt someone’s feelings, to which I say, “Grow a back bone, and get over it!”.

-Different relationships call for different types of boundaries.  Think about all the types of relationships you have in your life. Marriage, parenting, siblings, friendships, coworkers, and strangers. Set boundaries unique and appropriate to each relationship.

-Know what changes you want to make and what changes you need others to make. This is only a small step. The key comes from knowing how to achieve those changes. Make lists of small daily steps you can take to make progress toward your end goal. For help with goal setting, refer to my post about setting and accomplishing goals.

-Commit only to the things which make you comfortable. This is not to say “never step out of your comfort zone,” but to help you quit saying “yes” to things just to please someone else. If they pressure you, it means that they do not respect your boundaries.

-Communicate clearly and effectively. Use “I feel” statements, as opposed to figuratively pointing fingers at the other person(s). Sure, it’s easier to just be passive aggressive, and to stop talking to the person if they’ve wronged you. This doesn’t solve anything, and will leave them hurt and with questions.

Be ready for the outcome. You may or may not get the results you wanted, but you will get the outcome you need. You might hurt someone’s feelings, you may lose a friend, you may need to look for a new job, but you’ve stood your ground, and successfully set boundaries for yourself.